Category Archives: Uncategorized

Gracie Allen

Appliance salesman:  You’ll like this range. For instance, you
put in a roast, you set the oven control, then you go out all
day. When you come home at night, the roast is done.
Gracie:  Haven’t you got one where I don’t have to go out?

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Funny Quotes

Funny QuotesOnce, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. 
– W. C. Fields 1879-1946, American Actor

Funny Jokes

Leave a comment

Filed under Famous, Famous Quotes, Funny, Funny Quotations, Funny Quotes, Funny Sayings, Quotations, Quotes, Sayings, Uncategorized, W. C. Fields

Funny Quotes – On Grandma

On Grandma: My grandmother has a bumper sticker on her car that says, ‘Sexy Senior Citizen.’ You don’t want to think of your grandmother that way, do you? Out entering wet shawl contests. Makes you wonder where she got that dollar she gave you for your birthday.

– Andy Rooney

Funny Jokes

Leave a comment

Filed under Andy Rooney, Famous, Famous Quotes, Funny, Funny Quotations, Funny Quotes, Funny Sayings, Quotations, Quotes, Sayings, Uncategorized

Funny Quotes – Oscar Levant

A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.
– Oscar Levant

Leave a comment

Filed under Famous, Famous Quotes, Funny, Funny Quotations, Funny Quotes, Funny Sayings, Oscar Levant, Quotations, Quotes, Sayings, Uncategorized